Welcome to The North Poll: The Unabridged Birth Story

Well, I had a routine OB appointment Tues, Sept 4th, at which, I was dilated to 4+ish, slightly more effaced, but not much...

Yeah, done with that rate of progress. So, we talked more about induction. I didn't want to be induced because I don't like pitocin. I thought I could deliver this baby without medication, and I really wanted to have that experience if possible. From my history, pitocin has me curled up wanting to die with the next contraction, a surefire sign I wouldn't make it without the epidural. So, we discussed things we could do besides immediate pitocin, and I decided to go for it. (Plus I really wanted my doctor to be delivering that day!)

So, I spent Tues and Wed doing physical things to try and help me along (flying kites, cleaning house, walking, walking, walking.) Once while I was hefting something, Jeff even said "I'd get that for you, but then you wouldn't go into labor." :) Thurs morning, I called L&D and they had room, so we went in! (Mallory came over to take care of the girls til Chris was off work.) Check in was a breeze, and I was all changed and ready by 9. They had me on penicillin and monitors by 930. I then had an exam, where they said I was 5/5+ and maybe 60 effaced. Booyeah! 1cm in 2 days totally beats the previous 1cm in 3 weeks. I found it promising. I had to wait 4 hrs. for a second dose of penicillin before they could do anything more to move me along, so Jeff and I hung out, playing and catching sleep while it was low-key. During this first few hours, I wasn't having any kind of contractions. At all. They didn't even do my second exam.

When it was time for my second dose of penicillin, they gave me that, then started getting all setup to break my water. The exam said I was 5 or even 6, but the baby's head was still totally floating. She said if she ruptured that far dilated and with the head that high, there is a big risk for the cord to come out with the water, which would be emergency c-section. I was definitely not down for that (obviously.) So.... since nothing else was going on, my next option was Pitocin. It made me really sad, but they started me on just a one so that I wasn't slammed with pain. I was also waiting for some wireless monitors so I could get to walking. Somewhere in there, my mom and sisters showed up and then went to have lunch, thinking I'd be ruptured by the time they came back. But, no.

The pitocin picked up the activity a bit, but nothing regular or intense. After awhile, they upped it to three. Again, it picked up and I could actually start feeling the action, but contractions were still something like 7 minutes apart and not difficult at all. I tried walking and working the ball, but my monitors wouldn't work while I did so that wasn't very productive. They turned my pitocin up to five and then my doctor, Dr. Gibson just showed up on her own. The team on duty there at the U listened to what she was telling them, but they just didn't know me, my hopes for delivery and my conversations with my doctor. It just wasn't moving along the way we discussed and I think she wanted to come in and be in charge and interact with me. I was SO glad she did. Right when she walked in (maybe about 2 or 3ish,) she took over, checked me, talked with me and we got things moving. She set up to rupture the bag, made it happen safely, and just like I'd originally hoped, that was the ticket that finally got things moving. (She also told me the baby had already had a bowel movement in utero - awesome!) That happened right about 4:30 in the afternoon.

This is where things got crazy. Like I said, the breaking water kicked labor right in gear. The problem was, they still left the pitocin on at 5. That next hour was everything I had been fearing when it comes to pitocin. My contractions started coming so fast and so strong that I was just not prepared in any way. I mean, literally. I was definitely crying, screaming, breaking Jeff's hand and coping in terrible ways. I had done some preparation, read many books and methods of natural childbirth, setup relaxing music and just mentally prepared myself... but there was a huge gap in the actual application due to the immediate onslaught of pain. The contractions hurt so bad, and while they were the problem, they were not the main reason the last hour was so unbearable for me. The problem was how quickly they came. When a contraction finally subsided, I would try to change to a more comfortable or at least productive position, but I did not even have time to flip from front to back before the next one came. (And of course, I couldn't do anything during them.) I couldn't even get my hair up and out of my face in between. That was the one thing that really sent me over the edge. Even in all the reading I did about natural childbirth, there was always a big deal about your body needing (and getting) its rest period between contractions... so I was expecting something a little different. That also meant there was never time for an entire exam between contractions either, so that was just one more pain on top of all the rest of them.

So, anyway, I had one full hour of increasing pain and decreasing resolve. I don't want to put a bad spin on it, but again, I was simply unprepared and I got to the point where I told them I did not want to do this anymore. Mercifully, they shut off the pitocin completely and even offered me fentinol (sp?) a painkiller, which I readily accepted. After another exam, though, they determined I was too far along and gave me only a half dose. I have to say, I didn't actually notice a difference from either action (decreasing pitocin or the painkiller,) but thank goodness - it only could have been worse without them! I spent a little time on hands and knees with a great nurse helping me through it and Jeff never leaving my side. I spent some other time with a squat bar on my bed, and my doc, nurse and spouse (and I think sister - it is seriously a blur) were all amazing at encouraging me and coaching me. I was so focused (consumed) with my laboring that it seems I never correctly heard the results of the intermittent exams. I was under the impression I wasn't progressing very quickly, and because of that, I couldn't understand why no one was listening to me. I had definitely started the "I can't do this, I don't WANT to do this anymore" mantra and wanted someone to call for the epidural. Apparently, in reality, I was about ready to go, but it was totally news to me until I started feeling like I had to push ("or vomit" I said. My doc said "we can handle both." haha)

So, with my doc, Jeff, a couple of nurses, my mom, two sisters and an entire pediatrics team, I began to push. I made all sorts of terrible noises, but again, had good coaching reminding me to channel all the energy from my voice and scrunchy face into my pushing. My team would count with me and say "now right back at it" but it took me awhile to realize that they meant keep going, because the contractions were never ending! It was so painful! Finally, after a few less-productive pushes, I had a moment sentient enough where I realized I could do better and was only prolonging the agony. I was able to lean back, get a huge breath and push warrior-style. That was it - I felt the head bust through, and then even more vividly, the awkward shape of his body following after. Jeff said he has never seen or heard so much relief in a person as in my face and exhalation at that moment! He had to be rushed to the pediatrics team because of meconium and group b-strep, so I only caught a vague glimpse of him at first.

I finished up the business of labor (afterbirth, stitches) and finally saw that Jeff had our baby, and I called "can I see my baby?" At that point, I finally got to see the gorgeous face that justified all the chaos. Carson Radcliffe North, born 9-6-12 at 5:28 pm, was 7 lbs. 8.8 oz. and 18.5 inches long. His first apgar was an 8, and he had no problems at all while we were at the hospital. He was born with a fair amount of hair and a fun crease across his nose that makes him look stern. He actually has slept fair amounts at night, which is my saving blessing. He still wakes up to eat, but goes right back to sleep and allows mom to be less of a zombie for her other kiddies.

The girls got to come meet him the next day, and they are totally in love with him and continue to be enchanted with everything that he does. They spent the 3 or 4 days between grandmas' houses and were very tired out (and spoiled!) by the time we got them Sunday night.

Heading into Labor and Delivery